Title: Primate
MPA Rating: Not Rated
Director: Johannes Roberts
Starring: Johnny Sequoyah, Troy Kotsur, Jessica Alexander
Runtime: 1 hr 29 mins

What It Is: Ben is the family pet for Lucy (Sequoyah), her father Adam (Kotsur), and her younger sister Erin (Gia Hunter). Normally, Ben—a chimp—is playful and full of joy. But something’s off about him now. He’s aggressive, ill-tempered, and not himself. It turns out Ben has contracted rabies, and it’s beginning to take control. Now, he’s completely lost his mind and is leaning into his animalistic instincts. Lucy, Erin, and a few of Lucy’s friends find themselves in grave danger at the hands of a chimpanzee on a rabid rampage.

What We Think: My quick reaction after walking out of the theater read as follows: “What if, like… Michael Myers was a monkey?” Which, honestly, is pretty accurate. Ben is an unstoppable force of nature—you’re never sure where this rabid chimp will appear or what he’ll do next. Unfortunately, this film suffers from typical Blumhouse shenanigans. There’s one scene that entertained me, but those moments are few and far between. In fact, there really aren’t any genuinely interesting parts here. All the “twists” and “turns” in the script are predictable and poorly executed.

Our Grade: C-, Meh. This just didn’t do anything for me. It’s the second year in a row that the opening night closer has disappointed, following last year’s Never Let Go. I wanted to have fun with this, but I really didn’t. If you can’t have fun with a dumb horror movie concept—and make no mistake, this is a dumb concept—then what’s the point of it all? This film comes out in January and if you’ve seen on Blumhouse January release you’ve seen them all. No surprises, nothing good enough to speak of. A gigantic skip, sadly.